Transcriber's Note: Each paragraph is containedwithin a full-page illustration, so theillustration tags within the text havebeen removed to avoid congestion. * * * * * A MASQUE OF DAYS [Illustration] A MASQUE OF DAYS CASSELL & COMPANY LIMITED: LONDON: [Illustration] FROM THE LAST ESSAYS OF ELIA: NEWLY DRESSED & DECORATED BY WALTER CRANE PARIS, NEW YORK & MELBOURNE. 1901. [Illustration] * * * * * THE OLD YEAR being dead, and the NEW YEAR coming of age, wh: he does byCalendar Law, as soon as the breath is out of the old gentleman's body, nothing would serve the young spark but he must give a dinner upon theoccasion, to wh: all the Days in the year were invited. The Festivals, whom he deputed as his stewards, were mightily taken with the notion. They had been engaged time out of mind, they said, in providing mirth andgood cheer for mortals below; and it was time they should have a taste oftheir own bounty. It was stiffly debated among them whether the Fastsshould be admitted. Some said, that the appearance of such lean, starvedguests, with their mortified faces, would pervert the ends of the meeting. But the objection was overruled by Christmas Day who had a design upon AshWednesday (as you shall hear), and a mighty desire to see how the oldDomine would behave himself in his cups. Only the VIGILS were requested to come with their lanterns to light thegentlefolks home at night. All the Days came to their day. Covers were provided for three hundred andsixty-five guests at the principal table; with an occasional knife andfork at the side-board for the Twenty-Ninth of February. I should have told you that cards of invitation had been issued. Thecarriers were THE HOURS twelve little, merry whirligig foot-pages asyou should desire to see, that went all round, and found out the personsinvited well enough, with the exception of Easter Day, Shrove Tuesday, anda few such Moveables, who had lately shifted their quarters. Well, they all met at last, foul Days, fine Days, all sorts of Days, and a rare din they made of it. There was nothing but, Hail! fellowDay, --well met--brother Day--sister Day--only LADY DAY kept a little aloofand seemed somewhat scornful. Yet some said, TWELFTH DAY cut her out andout, for she came in a tiffany suit, white and gold, like a queen on afrost-cake, all royal glittering, and Epiphanous. The rest came, some in green, some in white--but old Lent and hisfamily were not yet out of mourning. Rainy Days came in, dripping; and sun-shiny Days helped them to changetheir stockings. Wedding Day was there in his marriage finery, a little the worse forwear. Pay Day came late, as he always does; and Doomsday sent word--he mightbe expected. April Fool (as my young lord's jester) took upon himself to marshal theguests, and wild work he made with it. It would have posed old Erra Paterto have found out any given Day in the year, to erect a scheme upon goodDays, bad Days were so shuffled together, to the confounding of all soberhoroscopy. He had stuck the Twenty-First of June next to the Twenty-Secondof December, and the former looked like a Maypole siding a marrow-bone. Ash Wednesday got wedged in (as was concerted) betwixt Christmas & LordMayor's Days. Lord! how he laid about him! Nothing but barons of beef &turkeys would go down with him to the great greasing & detriment of hisnew sackcloth bib and tucker. And still Christmas Day was at his elbow, plying him with the wassail-bowl, till he roared, & hiccupp'd, &protested there was no faith in dried ling, a sour, windy, acrimonious, censorious hy-po-crit-crit-critical mess & no dish for a gentleman. Thenhe dipt his fist into the middle of the great custard that stood beforehis left-hand neighbour, & daubed his hungry beard all over with it, tillyou would have taken him for the Last Day in December it so hung inicicles. At another part of the table, Shrove Tuesday was helping the Second ofSeptember to some cock broth, --which courtesy the latter returned withthe delicate thigh of a hen pheasant--so there was no love lost for thatmatter. The Last of Lent was spunging upon Shrovetide's pancakes; which AprilFool perceiving, told him he did well, for pancakes were proper to a goodfry-day. In another part a hubbub arose about the Thirtieth of January, who, itseems, being a sour puritanic character, that thought nobody's meat goodor sanctified enough for him, had smuggled into the room a calf's head, which he had had cooked at home for that purpose, thinking to feastthereon incontinently; but as it lay in the dish March Many-weathers, who is a very fine lady, and subject to the meagrims, screamed out therewas a "human head in the platter, " and raved about Herodias' daughter tothat degree, that the obnoxious viand was obliged to be removed; nor didshe recover her stomach till she had gulped down a Restorative, confectedof Oak Apple, which the merry Twenty-Ninth of May always carries aboutwith him for that purpose. The King's health being called for after this, a notable dispute arosebetween the 12th of August (a zealous old Whig gentlewoman), and theTwenty Third of April (a new-fangled lady of the Tory stamp) as to whichof them should have the honour to propose it. August grew hot upon the matter, affirming time out of mind theprescriptive right to have lain with her, till her rival basely supplantedher; * * * April Fool being made mediator, confirmed the right in the strongest form of words to the appellant, but decided for peace' sake that the exercise of it should remain with the present possessor. * * * It beginning to grow a little duskish, Candlemas lustily bawled out forlights which was opposed by all the Days, who protested against burningdaylight. Then fair water was handed round in silver ewers, and the samelady was observed to take an unusual time in washing herself. May-Day, with that sweetness which is peculiar to her, in a neat speechproposing the health of the founder, crowned her goblet, {and by herexample the rest of the company} with garlands. This being done, thelordly New Year from the upper end of the table, in a cordial butsomewhat lofty tone, returned thanks. He felt proud on an occasion ofmeeting so many of his father's late tenants, promised to improve theirfarms, & at the same time to abate {if anything was found unreasonable} intheir rents. At the mention of this the Four Quarter Days involuntarily looked ateach other, & smiled; April Fool whistled to an old tune of "New Brooms" &a surly old rebel at the further end of the table {who was discovered tobe no other than the Fifth-of-November} muttered out distinctly enough tobe heard by the whole company, words to this effect, that, "when the oldone is gone, he is a fool that looks for a better. " Which rudeness of his, the guests resenting, unanimously voted his expulsion; & the malcontentwas thrust out neck & heels into the cellar, as the properest place forsuch a boutefeu & firebrand as he had shewn himself to be. Order being restored--the young lord {who, to say truth, had been alittle ruffled & put beside his oratory} in as few, & yet as obligingwords as possible, assured them of entire welcome; &, with a gracefulturn, singling out poor Twenty-Ninth of February, that had sate all thiswhile mumchance at the side-board, begged to couple his health with thatof the good company before him--which he drank accordingly; observing, that he had not seen his honest face any time these four years--with anumber of endearing expressions besides. At the same time, removing thesolitary Day from the forlorn seat which had been assigned to him, hestationed him at his own board, somewhere between the Greek Calends andLatter Lammas. Ash Wednesday, being now called upon for a song, with his eyes fast stuckin his head, & as well as the Canary he had swallowed would give himleave, struck up a Carol, which Christmas Day had taught him for thenonce; & was followed by the latter, who gave "Miserere" in fine style, hitting off the mumping notes & lengthened drawl of Old Mortification withinfinite humour. [April Fool swore they had exchanged conditions; but Good Friday was observed to look extremely grave; & Sunday held her fan before her face, that she might not be seen to smile. ] Shrove tide, Lord Mayor's Day, and April Fool, next joined in a glee-- Which is the properest day to drink? in which all the days chiming in, made a merry burden. They next fell to quibbles & conumdrums. The question being proposed, who had the greatest number of followers--theQuarter Days said, there could be no question as to that; for they had allthe creditors in the world dogging their heels. But April Fool gave it infavour of the Forty Days before Easter; because the debtors in all casesoutnumbered the creditors, & they kept _lent_ all the year round. All this while Valentine's Day kept courting pretty May, who sate nexthim, slipping amorous billets-doux under the table, till the Dog Days{who are naturally of a warm constitution} began to bark and rageexceedingly. April Fool, who likes a bit of sport above measure, & had somepretensions to the lady besides as being but a cousin onceremoved, --clapped & halloo'd them on; and as fast as their indignationcooled those mad wag's, the Ember Days, were at it with their bellows, toblow it into a flame; & all was in a ferment: till old Madame Septuagesima{who boasts herself the Mother of the Days} wisely diverted theconversation with a tedious tale of the lovers which she could reckonwhen she was young; & of one Master Rogation Day in particular, who wasfor ever putting the question to her; but she kept him at a distance, asthe chronicle wd: tell--by which I apprehend she meant the Almanack. Then she rambled on to the Days that were gone, the good old Days, & so tothe Days before the Flood--which plainly showed her old head to be littlebetter than crazed & doited. Day being ended, the Days called for their cloaks & great-coats & tooktheir leaves. Lord Mayor's Day went off in a mist as usual; Shortest Day in a deep blackFog that wrapt the little gentleman all round like a hedgehog. TwoVigils--so watchmen are called in heaven--saw Christmas Day safehome--they had been used to the business before. Another Vigil--a stout, sturdy patrole, called the Eve of St. Christopher--seeing Ash Wednesdayin a condition little better than he should be--e'en whipt him over hisshoulders, pick-a-back fashion, & Old Mortification went floating homesinging-- "On the bat's back do I fly, " & a number of old snatches besides, between drunk & sober; but very fewAves or Penitentiaries {you may believe me} were among them. Longest Dayset off westward in beautiful crimson & gold--the rest, some in onefashion, some in another; but Valentine & pretty May took their departuretogether in one of the prettiest silvery twilights a Lover's Day couldwish to set in. FINIS [Illustration] FINIS [Illustration]