Purchase of this book includes free trial access to www.million-books.com where you can read more than a million books for free. This is an OCR edition with typos. Excerpt from book: She likes der Deutscher shentlemens, Und dells me sit peside her— I dinks, maype, I vas der fly, Und she vas peen der shpider. I vent indo der shmoking - car, Vhere dhey vas blaying boker, Und also haf somedings dhey calls Der funny "leedle joker." DER SHPIDER UND DER FLY. Some money id vas shanging hands, Dhey wanted me to try— I says, " You vas too brevious; I don'd vas peen a fly!" On Central Park a shmardt young man Says, " Strauss, bow vas you peen ?" Und dake me kindly py der hand, Und ask off mine Katrine. He vants to shange a feefty bill, Und says bees name vas Schneider— Maype, berhaps he vas all righdt; More like he vas a shpider. Mosd efry day some shvindling chap, He dries hees leedle game; I cuts me oudt dot shpider biece, Und poot id in a frame; Righdt in mine shtore I hangs id oup, Und near id, on der shly, I geeps a glub, to send gvick oudt Dhose shpiders "on der fly." MINE SCHILDHOOD. Der schiltren dhey vas poot in ped, All tucked oup for der nighdt; I dakes mine pipe der mantel off, Und py der fireside prighdt I dinks aboudt vhen I vas young— Off moder, who vas tead, Und how at nia;hdt—like I do Hans— She tucked me oup in ped. I mindt me off mine fader, too, TJnd how he yoost to say, " Poor poy, you haf a hardt oldt row To hoe, und leedle blay!" I find me oudt dot id vas drue Vot mine oldt fader said, Vhile srnoodhing down mine flaxen hair Und tucking me in ped. Der oldt folks! Id vas like a dhream To shpeak off dhem like dot. Gretchen und I vas "oldt folks" now, Und haf two schiltreu got. Ve lofes dhem more as neffer vas, Each leedle curly head, Und efry nighdt ve takes dhem oup Und tucks dhem in dheir ped. Budt dhen, somedimes, vhen I feels pl...